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Teleprospecting And The Luck Of The Lorax

  
  
  
  

As the end of the month draws near, everyone at AG works extra hard to get the last few leads qualified. Some people come in early, others stay late, and there’s quite a few lunches being eaten at desks. Everyone works even more strategically at the end of the month, and tries to maximize each dial and email. But sometimes a little extra something is needed for that final push, and that extra something is of course a good luck charm.

There are several tried and true teleprospecting talismans at AG, and these enchanted objects come in a variety of shapes and sizes. There’s the Lead Saber, a small Star Wars light saber from a Happy Meal that bestows upon its possessor the knowledge of the Force and the ability to Jedi Mind Trick a prospect into a discovery call with a rep (after being fully qualified, of course), the Lead “Jacket,” a flamboyantly patterned silk button-down shirt that when worn increases the charisma of its wearer to such an extent that a prospect can’t help but agree to a next step, and the Lead Revolver, a Wild West-style silver toy revolver that instills in the one who holds it such a way with words a prospect might mistake them for John Wayne. 

LoraxAnd then there’s the Lorax. The Lorax is a small wire sculpture that I made in college of Dr. Seuss’ famous character from the book of the same name. I originally brought him in to show to a couple people, but we soon discovered the Lorax’s secret lead generating ability. Namely, if the Lorax is given a small present (such as a cough drop, a paper crane, or some pretend “bling”), the donator is granted a lead or two. The Lorax’s followers have increased as news of his powers has spread, and several skeptics are now believers. It’s even become customary for many of us to “pray to the Lorax” before an important call.

But before I leave you picturing everyone at AG running around the office believing that we’re Jedi and cowboys, offering sacrifices to a false idol (I could see you getting a little worried over there), I will clarify and say that no one is superstitious enough to really believe in any of this. As always, we work hard and we have fun, and with that winning combination we see results. So make those extra dials, send out those e-vites, and be sure to recycle. The Lorax speaks for the trees, after all.

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